February 2012
6 posts
Awakening.
Tonight.. Will be unforgettable. Jason and I went to eat some dim sum with some of my coworkers. It was a fun dinner, good food with great friends. On our way home, Jason was getting into the express lane when last minute I saw a broken piece of a pole that separates the regular traffic lane and express lane.. I then just realized we were going to hit it. I screamed JASON.. He tried to avoid it...
January 2012
5 posts
Life is amazing.
December 2011
9 posts
Torn.
It makes me so sad we’re not as close anymore. Makes me even more sad that you don’t care or even notice but I’ve decided it’s okay. It’s Christmas! I’m surrounded by good people with good hearts. I’m thankful for what I have. Merry Christmas everyone. 2011 was rough but it’s ending well. Can’t wait for 2012.. Oh and for Susie Jeon to finally...
Don't worry, be happy!
Yeah yeah I screwed up this semester. I got next spring to make up for it. This is just a lesson to me saying wake the fuck up and do shit right. I got this. I got this!
365 days.
I couldn’t be happier. Everything else kind of blows, but with just this aspect in my life going well, I’m actually sane and holding on. I even got spoiled for once and as grateful and happy as I was, I’m starting to feel bad he spent all this money on me. Truly blessed and grateful right now. All I need now is to get through this bummy semester and start off fresh and do amazing...
Really happy right now.
And for no special reason or event. I just feel so good and so content. ‘knock on wood’ please, don’t let this a fluke.
November 2011
13 posts
Realization.
I’ve been so angry with you for so long. You hurt me and caused me to become all kinds of pathetic. I was so angry. But I’ve been through a lot the past year, and i’ve learned a lot. you’ll probably never read this but I hope somehow you’ll know how I feel now. I just wanted to say, I’m sorry. This whole time I just blamed you and all that stupid bs.. I...
Up and down
My life this whole week but finally on the up. Except I’m a huge ass and as bad as I feel, I don’t regret it. Is that bad?
-____________-
YOU lied to me.
I should be mad, I have every right to be. Even if you were trying to do what was “best” for me. You should have known lying wasn’t the right way. Especially since I caught you right in the middle of it all. I don’t even know what to think or do.
Nights like these
Are the reason why I feel so lucky and fortunate.
Don't tell me you got me something just to make...
It's been a minute
So much craziness this month. So much is going on. I’m finally 21! Uhh but all I got to say, fuck school but I love my life. I have an amazing boyfriend and amazing friends. Happy happy happy :)
October 2011
5 posts
So.
Everything is kind of better.
-Job wise, the situation isn’t ideal, but it’s better than nothing. I’m sure it’ll get better soon.
-School is a pain in the ass, but it always will be. But I think I’m grasping how to get shit done now.
-Money.. Well that’s still a issue to be resolved but my brother is giving me a credit card for gas money and emergencies.. So...
I try so hard to keep going. I keep telling myself, it’s going to be okay over and over again. I try to believe everything will work out cause I have no other choice, but it’s so hard. I’m holding back my tears so I can stay strong for my parents. It’s 3:30 pm already and my parents have only sold 100$ worth of sales.. It sickens my stomach. I remember when it would be...
Things are finally slowly falling into place
Thanks to good people with encouraging and optimistic advice. I think if I just can keep up with it all, I’ll be, I am going to be good. 10 months with Jason, and very happy. Still. 21st birthday coming up. Job interviews set up. Friends coming into town. Taking care of business. :) yay. Oh but on a kind of bad note, fuck lawyers and their cheap shots and tricks. Fuck you!
September 2011
6 posts
Sitting in accounting
Not paying attention. Not really tired or anything, just one of those days. Been thinking. A lot lately. Been kind of a bummer, too. Kept thinking about how shitty everything is. With my parents, bills, school, friends, past and the future. And after getting some good advice, I just kind of have to shrug it off. Yes, money is tight and a lot of bullshit is happening, but it is what it is. Got to...
Nine months
I usually don’t care for month anniversary but I’m feeling happy right now. Happy nine months Jason Bryant Kaelin. Thank you for everything. I love you :)
Torn
Between just going with it and having fun or thinking about the ending cause we’ll never be on the same page.. I told you I didn’t want to go through it again and all you said was everyone goes through it.. Thanks? For the reassurance? What to do..
On a different note, school kind of blows. Math on math on math plus English for me this semester. Luckily none of my professors seem...
August 2011
22 posts
Fuck everything.
This is dedicated to my beautiful mom.
My mom is short and kind of chubby. She walks with a limp sometimes cause her knees and feet ache all the time. She has really bad eyes and almost a lazy eye on the right but we don’t have the money or insurance to correct it, so she just deals with it. She was of those moms that like to constantly touch you, almost being annoying half the time. My mom likes to act like a baby and try to be...
Karma
Me: So.. You really think I’m one of the good karma you got?
J: you’re the very reason why I believe in it so much.
Got me thinking.
Missing the good old days.
